Sex and the Fat Girl: The Joys of Fat Porn

Many fat girls bristle at the mention of fat/BBW porn. Of course among some feminists, any porn can be a hot topic, but for some fat feminist girls there’s something in particular that’s troubling about the idea that someone gets off on a body simply because it’s fat. They may find it exploitative, or objectifying, or demeaning. As a sex-positive, porn-loving, fat, feminist girl I do understand the problems with the porn industry and its history of exploiting women. But the product itself, the porn, I see no problem with unless it’s non-consensual. So seeing as how I enjoy porn, I also don’t have a problem with fat/BBW porn. I don’t see it as offensive or exploitative simply because it’s directed at people who get off on seeing fat women’s bodies. In fact, I think it’s an extremely positive thing to encourage people to see fat women as sexual beings.

It’s not as simple as that, of course. The problems start when the fat fetish comes off the computer screen and intrudes into our real lives when it’s not welcome, like in our dating lives. I’ve heard fat girls say they think fat fetishism is creepy, that they feel objectified, that they feel the person with the fetish doesn’t like them as a whole person. (Not to say that everyone who dates fat people is a fat fetishist, obviously.) And that may all be true—except the creepy part, of course—but that doesn’t mean that other fat girls don’t enjoy engaging in fat fetishism and seek out people with said fetish, and it doesn’t mean they’re wrong for doing so. Yes, usually when you’re dating or looking for a relationship you want to avoid people who aren’t interested in you as a person, but we shouldn’t condemn fat fetishists and the fat girls who love them if they choose those relationships. It’s just another form of self-love, really, because if you can accept someone finding the very thing about you that society sees as unappealing attractive, you’re really living fat acceptance. That’s a positive thing.

I’ve found that watching porn with fat women in it to be a very good way to learn to appreciate and love your body, and to reinforce the idea that we are capable of enjoying sex just as much as thin women. When I began watching porn with fat women who had bodies like me, it was challenging to see those women’s bodies as attractive sometimes—and meeting that challenge is a very important step on the fat acceptance path. I was recently asked my thoughts over at The Adipositivity Project; the inquirer wanted to know if I thought the project (which includes nude photos) was exploitative of fat bodies. I honestly can’t see anything exploitative about the consensual display of naked fat women’s bodies, whether in a more blatantly fat positive manner such as said project, or the less politically correct manner of fat porn. I think either one can be therapeutic if viewed with an open mind. By “therapeutic” I’m not cheekily trying to say sexually satisfying, although in the case of fat porn, I guess yeah, I am.

Sometimes I wonder if the idea of fat/BBW porn is so disturbing to some because they’re just not there yet. Maybe they’re just not ready to accept fatness as sexy, maybe they’re not far enough down that road—especially if they don’t have a problem with porn with thinner people in it. But that’s conjecture. I’m interested in your thoughts on the topic. If you feel it’s problematic, I’d like to know why. If you just want to testify to its hotness, that’s welcome, too.

Let’s get a discussion going, and if I get enough material, maybe I’ll do another post about this. What do you think?

[link to original post on Bitch Magazine]

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  • http://iteari.livejournal.com Alison

    I like BBW porn. I do. I feel so sexual when I see other fat women engaging in their sexuality. It has done a lot for my self esteem I think. April Flores has to be my favorite porn actress to go to, her delight in what she does is contagious. It’s not just porn where I want fat women in a humanized light, but in television, books, movies, you name it, but it’s a start.

    • samille ganges

      This is a fastenating topic and one I can relate to because I have just recently found out I am NOT into Fat porn and it immediately made me wonder why!?!?!  Like is there still things I need to work on?  Am I not done breaking down these walls?  This has definitelty hit a chord with me!

      http://www.thickdaddys.blogspot.com

  • http://iteari.livejournal.com/ Alison

    I like BBW porn. I do. I feel so sexual when I see other fat women engaging in their sexuality. It has done a lot for my self esteem I think. April Flores has to be my favorite porn actress to go to, her delight in what she does is contagious. It’s not just porn where I want fat women in a humanized light, but in television, books, movies, you name it, but it’s a start.

    • samille ganges

      This is a fastenating topic and one I can relate to because I have just recently found out I am NOT into Fat porn and it immediately made me wonder why!?!?!  Like is there still things I need to work on?  Am I not done breaking down these walls?  This has definitelty hit a chord with me!

      http://www.thickdaddys.blogspot.com

  • Whitney Teal

    I’m always looking for good fat porn. My issue is the lack of diversity. It’s always hard, fast pounding from the back. Even folks like James deen, who is known for “intimacy” in his porn films, fucks fat women like dogs, exclusively.

  • Whitney Teal

    I’m always looking for good fat porn. My issue is the lack of diversity. It’s always hard, fast pounding from the back. Even folks like James deen, who is known for “intimacy” in his porn films, fucks fat women like dogs, exclusively.